40% of the things we worry about never happen, 30% are in the past and can't be helped, 12% involve the affairs of others that are not our business, 10% relate to sickness- real or imagined..
so only 8% of the things we worry about are likely to happen.
So how reliable is the brain at telling you the truth? Not very reliable!
How can we overcome these (mostly) invalid thoughts in order to reduce our worrying and anxiety?
We need to TRUST!
Trust is so important as when we do this, we are giving up control and a constant need to fixate on every little past or future detail. We are learning to let life unfold as it would anyway- without the unnecessary and debilitating inner voices. Lastly, we are learning to believe that we are strong enough to handle things when we are faced with them in the present moment.
Here are four things we can start working on now to increase our trust and decrease our worrying-
1. Accept
We must trust that what is meant to happen will unfold as it should. As it states above, we can't change the past and we can't accurately predict the future, nearly half of the time we are predicting things that never happen anyway. That is a waste of time, a waste of your happiness.
Anxiety and worrying is usually made up of dwelling on the past or worrying about and anticipating the future. When we give up trying to control everything and trust that we are exactly where we need to be, and we're given what we are capable of handling, we can start to relax.
The less we try to to resist the present moment from happening and the more we can accept the things we are going through in real time, the less worrying and negative thoughts we feel that fuel our anxiety.
2. Trust the timing of your life
I'm sure there are many times in your life that, at the actual time seemed like hell. You couldn't see the light to the situation, but looking back now, you can see how necessary it was for it to happen because of a certain reason. It could be that it made you stronger, or that it lead you to something even better for you.
Remember that these times happened, and trust that life is made up of challenging experiences that teach us and help us grow.
The 'bad' things will inevitably happen and cause us pain. It's our choice of how long we suffer.
3. Let go of the fixed outcome
When we are so hung up on how we want something to turn out or even how we expect something to go horribly wrong- we can miss all the other possibilities out there. Becoming so focused on one outcome can blind us to something better that is right In front of us or a simple solution we're missing because our worrisome-self is so caught up in negative thoughts.
We can start to let life unfold as it would have regardless, but without the attachment of worry, predictions, expectations, fear and set outcomes.
Let go and let life surprise you a little.
4. Trust yourself
We should also trust in ourselves that we are capable of tackling life's hurdles. Hey, you've made it this far haven't you? Humans are so strong and so resilient, you're no different. Trust that when something difficult does arise some way, some how, in that moment you'll get through it. When we are more confident in ourselves we tend to worry less about the 'what ifs?' and are more willing and ready to just go with the flow.
Ultimately, we all have a choice of what we choose to focus on. We could focus on worrying and trying to micro manage everything and hence create anxiety, fear and worry. Or, we can simply let go and trust.
By trusting we feel content, hope, happiness, peace, curiousity and joy. We are simply living in the moment- what nature intended us to do.
We are in fact, a warrior, not a worrier.
With love,
Jacqui Zdravkovski